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Rice's Crash Ticker
(Since 2-7-01):

Last Recorded Crash:

Brought to you by The Duchess of Rice

By: Gerry Wang

You know the drill. Pick the winners to the 6 major categories, and win the grand prize. Personally, I think THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS got bent over, its asshole lubricated, and rammed. No directing nod for Peter Jackson? No adapted screenplay nod?

I admit I haven't seen practically any of these sorry movies. I saw THE HOURS for free, and it was one of the worst pieces of crap I've ever had to sit through. Somehow they uglified perfectly doable actresses like Nicole Kidman and Julianne Moore. Fuck. And I saw one minute of CHICAGO before retching and leaving. I got a bad feeling about CHICAGO. Best Picture belongs to TTT. There is no justice.

The deadline to enter is March 23, 2003 @ 5:30 PST. You may re-submit to overwrite your old entries if you change your mind before the deadline. I have no idea what the prize is yet, but I got a new and sealed David Meece's "The Odyssey" CD for anyone who wants it. Wait! I have a new, sealed copy of SILENCE OF THE LAMBS on VHS. A great psychological thriller right there. That can be the prize, although mailing it will be a bitch. Oh well. Since this is the last contest Rice World will ever have, we can go out w/ a bang.

(Update: We have determined the grand prize to be a brand spanking new and crisp $5 bill! Of course, if you prefer either of the above prizes, just let us know. )

Adrien Brody, The Pianist
Nicolas Cage, Adaptation
Michael Caine, The Quiet American
Daniel Day-Lewis, Gangs of New York
Jack Nicholson, About Schmidt

Chris Cooper, Adaptation
Ed Harris, The Hours
Paul Newman, The Road to Perdition
John C. Reilly, Chicago
Christopher Walken, Catch Me If You Can

Salma Hayek, Frida
Nicole Kidman, The Hours
Diane Lane, Unfaithful
Julianne Moore, Far From Heaven
Renée Zellweger, Chicago

Kathy Bates, About Schmidt
Julianne Moore, The Hours
Queen Latifah, Chicago
Meryl Streep, Adaptation
Catherine Zeta-Jones, Chicago

CHICAGO, Rob Marshall
GANGS OF NEW YORK, Martin Scorsese
THE HOURS, Stephen Daldry
THE PIANIST, Roman Polanski
TALK TO HER, Pedro Almodovar


Total # of Oscars for CHICAGO:

Your E-mail Address: 

Readers' Comments:

Chicago: Haven't seen, most likely won't be seeing unless someone is willing to pay me. A lot.
Gangs of New York: Fell asleep halfway through. Slick directing, though.
The Hours: See Chicago above. Double the price.
LotR TT: Wham! Bam! Thank you, m'am! Loved it.
The Pianist: Never even HEARD of this. Sounds like the ugly offspring of Chicago & The Hours.

-- Rice
(Sat Mar 1 11:57:25 EST 2003)

I heard The Pianist is excellent, and I'm offering it to my World History students as extra credit. It's about a Jewish pianist in the midst of WWII in the Warsaw Ghetto. Supposed to be very violent and unrelenting, not pulling any punches. Now if only they'd release it wide so I can go see it @ a theater of my choosing......

-- Gerry
(Sat Mar 1 12:41:00 EST 2003)

I've only seen LotR II. Nothing else. But I didn't vote for anything for Chicago. It's a movie base on a successful music. I think the Oscar will deduct some points for that. (Not that they're in a grading scale.) Still, base on the knowledge of the movies trailers, I don't think Chicago will win that much award. But I do have a bad sense of taste, so who knows. (Oh yeah, Write this onto the main page. I don't think most people know about this yet. I just saw the corner and click. I don't remember seeing it on the main article page.

-- byanlor
(Tue Mar 4 2:14:24 EST 2003)

I think Chicago will do pretty well because of the gigantic hype machine behind it now, so that's why most of my votes went there. I agree, though, LoTR: TTT will get screwed over again, royally. Hopefully Return of the King can actually win the Oscar. And Peter Jackson deserves Best Director like no one else.

-- Sumir
(Wed Mar 19 3:07:00 EST 2003)

Welps, thanks to all you who entered. Believe me, I am grateful that you took the time to humor me. =) Congrats to icefloe on winning it all, taking 5 out of 6 to the bank. Gerry will arrange for the delivery of your winnings.

-- Rice
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